“See? I told you! Everything always works out!”
Oliver Bean is a sweet, accident-prone glass-is-full kind of guy who is rarely seen without a Band-Aid and could easily be the poster boy for the “Nailed It!” meme.
Oliver genuinely believes the universe is working in his favour—and somehow, it usually is. His accidents have an uncanny habit of leading to something surprisingly good. Trip over a curb? He discovers a fantastic new coffee shop. Miss the bus? Meets someone who becomes a great friend.
Oliver sees the silver lining in every rain cloud. Unfortunately, he rarely notices the cloud until he’s already standing in the rain—and he’s pretty sure the “Caution: Wet Floor” sign is just being negative.
He loves block parties, celebrating every quirky international World Day, and life on Plum Court, where all his friends live around him. To Oliver, every day is an excuse to celebrate, every mishap is an adventure, and every bruise is probably a sign that something wonderful is about to happen.
“I don’t burn people with my words, honey. I’m a ray of sun. I just burn away your delusions because I care.”
A brutally sarcastic, no-filter truth-teller who holds absolutely nothing back. The ultimate irony? Cora genuinely believes she is a gentle ray of sun whose biting, cynical insults are a “warm blessing” designed to help her neighbors reach their full potential.
She is a freelance life coach, motivational speaker, and part-time customer service representative at Troll Mart, where she spends her days helping people solve problems they probably created themselves.
Her business motto is: “Truth hurts, but I’m cheaper than therapy.”
Somehow, she knows everybody’s business—including things people are absolutely certain nobody knows.
Her customer service smile is legendary. Her patience is theoretical. Her clients may leave empowered, her customers may leave furious, but Cora leaves every encounter convinced she has made the world a better place.
She probably has.
“You’re still listening to music on streaming? Man, if it’s not a bootleg cassette recorded in a basement in 1992, you’re not actually hearing the frequencies.”
Boone Washington is an African American hipster, theremin virtuoso, coffee snob, and self-appointed musical revolutionary at Brass String Wind & Vibration, an indie instrument store where “regular guitar” is practically a swear word.
By day, he teaches theremin—making music by waving his hands around like he’s conducting an invisible orchestra or fighting an aggressive mosquito. By night, he’s in his recording studio, mixing tracks and pursuing his mission to change the musical landscape, usually while adjusting a knob that appears to do absolutely nothing.
Boone also runs a small underground bootleg cassette operation, insisting he’s not selling bootlegs—he’s “preserving underground musical history for future generations.” The fact that he makes money from it is merely an “economic side effect of cultural preservation.”
And coffee? Boone doesn’t drink it. He experiences it. Ask for a regular coffee around him and prepare to be judged.
Boone is cool, intensely serious about music, and absolutely convinced his next track will change everything.
It probably will.
He just needs to finish adjusting that knob.
“I’m not controlling. I simply have a very strong preference for things going exactly my way.”
Quartz Sterling is a self-proclaimed “Freelance Curator of Reclaimed Industrial Artifacts,” which is a fancy way of saying she buys utter crap at garage sales and is absolutely convinced it will be worth a fortune someday.
She despises corporate branding, consumer capitalism, and unnecessary logos. She even decants her dish soap into an unmarked bottle. Yet she cannot resist a bargain. She spends hours attacking logos on thrift-store clothing with tweezers, proudly wearing a sweatshirt that says “Ambercrumb & Itch” because she could only remove the F from Fitch.
Her prized collection includes a pair of rubber riding boots that she wears everywhere, a first-generation electric typewriter that doesn’t work and an all-metal two-seater fashioned from 1950s Massey Ferguson tractor seats. She proudly displays the tractor seats in her living room and genuinely expects guests to enjoy sitting in them. She is deeply offended when anyone chooses the sofa.
Quartz also collects grievances and writes strongly worded reviews about almost everything.
She is perpetually stressed by family drama, most of which she creates while trying desperately to prevent family drama.
She particularly dislikes logos, corporate mergers, guests who refuse to appreciate the ergonomic genius of her tractor seats, and Cora Sunshine’s cheerful observations about her life choices.
“Just go with the flow, dude. But if the wave’s good, you gotta commit.”
Toby Bond is a tall, muscular, ridiculously handsome surfer dude trapped in the soul-crushing reality of working as a loans officer at the bank. Naturally, he considers this temporary—because every good Bond needs a cover job.
A die-hard James Bond fan, Toby quotes Daniel Craig’s Bond with alarming frequency, often while approving mortgages. He approaches banking the way he approaches surfing: stay calm, read the conditions, and wait for the right opportunity to make your move.
Outside the bank, Toby competes in surfing competitions and occasionally wins, mostly because he can actually surf rather than simply talk about it—which he does constantly anyway.
His favourite unofficial holiday is Talk Like a Pirate Day, although Toby somehow turns it into Talk Like a Surfer Day. Everything is “dude,” every problem is “gnarly,” and every financial decision apparently requires “riding the wave.”
His coworkers have no idea what he’s talking about.
Toby thinks they’re missing the point.
“Not everything has to make sense to be wonderful. Some things are better left unexplained, like why the universe needs so many slushy machines.”
Pip Tennison is a slight, unassuming tech support wizard and devoted Doctor Who fan, particularly obsessed with David Tennant. He dresses like the Tenth Doctor every day—suit, skinny tie, sneakers and all—and treasures his growing collection of “sonic” screwdrivers, which are considerably less useful on computers than he insists they are.
Pip can repair almost any laptop or smartphone, but he’d much rather discuss the mysteries of the universe.
He collects vintage pocket watches, dreams of impossible adventures, and occasionally wonders where all the used-up time goes—whether there might be a retirement planet somewhere for old minutes and forgotten hours.
Though small in stature, Pip’s dreams are enormous, giving him a presence far bigger than his frame. He’s particularly fond of Meadow, whose wandering, flower-child spirit makes perfect sense to him. Together, they’re an unlikely pair: she follows butterflies, he follows impossible ideas, and neither has much use for ordinary reality.
“Grandpa Gerry always sang about ‘stuck in the middle with you.’ I think it’s so beautiful that he loved group hugs so much.”
Meadow Rafferty is a freelance dog walker and free-range wild child who occasionally forgets the dogs’ names, wanders off the trail to make daisy chains, and has been known to return from a walk with considerably more flowers, feathers, and interesting rocks than she left with.
She drives an old GMC Jimmy that she’s transformed into a rolling ’60s hippie dream—psychedelic paint, peace signs, dangling beads, and enough tie-dye to make a Grateful Dead concert jealous. She calls it The Love Bug, despite the fact that it definitely is not a Volkswagen.
Meadow is completely immune to sarcasm. Every witty insult, angry rant, or thinly veiled threat lands on her as a sincere and incredibly beautiful compliment. Tell her she’s “a complete disaster,” and she’ll smile and say, “Aww… that’s so sweet!”
She loves Grandpa Gerry Rafferty’s vinyl records, wind chimes, spontaneous adventures, and group hugs. She dislikes alarm clocks, rigid schedules, and anything that interferes with following a really interesting butterfly.
“I’m not paranoid. I’m just prepared for things that haven’t happened yet.”
Nellie Fretwell is a hypochondriac with anxiety so extreme it deserves its own emergency preparedness plan. She sells tickets at the front gate of the zoo, where every cough, sneeze, and unusual animal behavior gives her something new to worry about.
She can’t leave her bedroom without her fully equipped survival backpack—packed for nuclear winter, zombie apocalypse, and several disasters nobody has invented yet—plus her purse. Even if she’s only going to get a glass of water.
Nellie is particularly terrified of boa constrictors escaping into the sewer system and coming up through her toilet. She checks the seat before sitting down and has absolutely no intention of ever discussing why.
Most of her day is spent nose-deep in her phone, diagnosing herself on the internet. Unfortunately, she frequently needs someone to rescue her because she’s stuck on a webpage and can’t figure out how to get back.
Currently, Nellie is certain she has three rare terminal diseases. Two are already in the final stage.
And she’s pretty sure the third one is somehow related to the toilet
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